И опять.... Есть ли в этом мире что-то настоящее? Что-то стоящее в этих людях.. и так возвращаешься к тому что, твоя семья- твое все. Единственные люди, которым на тебя не похуй. Хотя мне просто повезло с семьей.

And once again, I'm just filled with anaesthesia. Or novicane whatever suits.
Everything is idle, I think I'm a bit lost. There ain't anything bad, other than hurting other people- don't do it, please. Just don't.

Reflecting on your self from a year ago? Is there any point? Really, I said it before and I'll say it again: no, there isn't- put the past in your behind.
It's time to express unimportant pointless thoughts that I most definitely don't want to discuss with anyone.
I have no idea what's happening. I've been a stuck up distant fuck for so long. I always feel that if I wait just a bit longer it will pass. But I have been neglecting all and any intimacy for the past forever. My family above all. The only true human thing that I have is my family and I've been arrogant and stuck up.. fuck, why?
Maybe it's because of my lonesomeness? I know that anything I have to do, I have to do myself. I am on my own, there's no warm feeling to come back to. If I want to stay fit, if I want to achieve anything, there isn't any artificial happiness or motivation to look up to or rely on.
I feel that everything I do is directly related to people- I like people, however at the same time it's like I'm giving more and not focusing on the things I should focus on, like physics. I guess it's a phase I need now.